My descent into the wilderness began in my early twenties. My mother died after enduring a brain tumor for several months. I had been a protected and emotionally dependent daughter. Two years later my father died suddenly from a heart attack. My only sibling, a brother, was on a naval ship in the Caribbean. The Cuban missile crisis loomed. I did not know in the time of my wilderness of grief and bewilderment that I carried the “seeds for sowing."
Slowly, I became aware of my relationship with God. I went to church more and many friends gave me emotional support. I read daily the prayer that began “Oh God of peace, who hast taught us that in returning and rest we shall be saved, in quietness and in confidence shall be our strength…” I began to listen to the voice within and in time I was led to take steps into a new life.
Leaving the dependent daughter behind, I continued to discover who I was. As a result, I dared to move to another city and find a new job. “Behold, I am doing a new thing.” My relationship to the divine within had become central to my living --- life became an exciting adventure. Out of all those tears came growth and a new kind of fulfillment. I had come home with “shouts of joy.”
Brenda Peterson
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